I'm impressed.

AUTHOR: Gabriele Schulz
EMAIL:
gabi@gschulz.de
RATING: R (mild)
DISTRIBUTION: Karya, Solo, Cap, Jess, Sai. Others please ask first.
SPOILERS: No.
FEEDBACK: Yes ;-)
SUMMARY: Giles and Xander stay at the Summers residence... B/G and a little X/Joyce
DISCLAIMER: The characters are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, 20th Century Fox Television, the WB Television Network, and whoever else may have a hold on them. I do not mean to infringe upon any copyrights.
NOTE: For Karya, because she asked. This is set in the "Library"-setting: Giles has a book store, called "The Library". Buffy works there, too, over the summer.
DATE: 8/25/99


"You will what?!?"

"Pose as your Dad and your mother's husband for a week."

"Why?"

"A potential client will stay with you and being very old-fashioned, he won't like to see that she is divorced."

"But why you?"

"She doesn't know anyone else."

"Of course she knows someone else! She knows... eh..."

"Me."

"Shut up, Xander!"

"Buff, I don't know, what's the big deal."

"They'll sleep in the same bed!!!"

"Exactly. In the same bed. Which is different from sleeping... you know what."

"But..."

"Buffy, I'm sorry this upsets you so. I... I couldn't refuse her."

"Why not? I do it ten times a day!"

"Eh, Giles, while Buffy is calming down..."

"I'm *not* calming down!"

"Well, then while Buffy is not calm, could I stay in your appartment during your stay at the Summers residence."

"Feel free to sleep on the couch."

"Thanks. Wait a minute. Why the couch? Am I not worthy to sleep in your bed?"

"You are, but I don't think Cordelia will share, or are you two back together?"

"Cordy?"

"I offered her to stay here. I didn't know, you'd need it."

"Great, I thought for once it wouldn't be the couch. Hey, what about your guestroom, Buff? Can I stay at your place?"

"Hey, I'm still mad at Giles and I don't know. Ask my Mom!"

********

"Of course, Xander. I cannot believe they threw you out again."

"Yeah, well, they are kind of insistent with that rent thing."

She smiled at him.

"Sorry. And unfortunately I can only offer the couch. You know about the visitor we'll get."

"Yes, Buffy told us. But I think I prefer your couch to Giles' this time. It's gonna be an interesting week after all."

"Well, I have to ask you for one thing though."

"Everything you want."

"Call me Mom."

********

"Xander as my brother, you as my dad. What's gonna be next? Oz as my uncle?"

"Still upset?"

"I... I'm sorry about yelling at you."

"That's okay."

He smiled at her.

"I... can I ask you something, Giles?"

"Of course."

"I... I need to know this, although I'm not sure I want to hear it, well, not if the answer is what I *so* hope it will *not* be, but tell me the truth anyway."

He waited for her to go on and when she didn't he asked.

"What is the question?"

"Oh, the question, yes. Eh... you're not in love with my mom, are you?"

"No, Buffy, I'm not."

She sighed in relief.

"Thank god."

"Don't worry. I'm not in love with her and I won't be after this week. I promise."

"Thank you."

She hugged him and they went out with the stuff they had packed for Giles' stay.

********

"Mr. Peterson. May I introduce, this is my husband Rupert, our daughter Buffy and our son Xander."

"You didn't mention a son."

"He's here on vacation."

"Ah."

********

The evening went without problems. Xander and Buffy were teasing each other. Giles and Joyce gave them reproachful looks. They were just an average family.

At two o'clock in the morning Buffy heard someone come down the stairs.

"Couldn't sleep either?"

"Oh, Buffy. No. I... I couldn't sleep."

"It's so weird. To know that you lie only a couple of feet away - with my mom! I can't stop thinking of that."

The reason *he* was here, was because he thought of *her*, but he knew better than to tell her.

********

Buffy and Giles dreamed about each other. And it were those dreams that caused them to rush to the bathroom early in the morning to take a very cold shower. They practically ran into each other.

"Oh, morning Giles. I... I wanted to take a shower, but if y-"

Her gaze dropped down to the bulge in his pyjama pants.

When she realized that he probably needed a cold shower, too, she felt her heart break into a million pieces.

"You can go first."

Then she ran into her room.

"Buffy!"

He wondered whether he should go after her, but realizing that his state would probably only get worse, considering the little she wore right now, he decided to take the shower first.

********

Buffy lay on her bed and cried. She couldn't help the sobs. The tears streamed out of her down her face, just like the hope, she had harbored.

She heard a knock at her door.

"Buffy?"

"Go away!"

"Buffy, I..."

He opened the door and came in.

"I don't really know what to say."

"Why did you lie to me?"

"Lie to you?"

"Why did you have to promise you wouldn't fall in love with her when you couldn't keep that promise?"

He looked at her tear-covered face. He could tell her that it was just a normal morning reaction. But he couldn't lie to her right now. And he couldn't face her either so he just said.

"It wasn't your mom, Buffy. It was you."

Then he was out of the room before she could say anything.

********

She ran after him - straight into Mr. Peterson.

"Oh, Mr. Peterson. Good morning. Eh, bye."

She turned around and went back to her room. She closed the door behind her and sighed. She felt like she was floating three feet above the ground.

Giles wanted her.

Just like she wanted him. She jumped onto the bed happily, thinking of when she could finally make her greatest dream come true.

********

They were driving to "The Library" together. Giles was silent as he had been most of the time that morning. He seemed sad and her constant smiles towards him hadn't changed that.

When the house was out of sight, Buffy whirled around towards him and kissed him.

He nearly drove into a parking car, but hit the brakes just in time.

"Buffy!"

Now that they were standing, she kissed him more thoroughly and when he finally realized, what the hell was going on, he kissed her back passionately.

A couple of minutes later he felt her hand on his zipper.

"Stop."

"What?" she panted.

He removed the hand that was under her top on her breast.

"Not here."

Then he drove off at lightning speed, trying to avoid an accident, while she nibbled at his ear and moved her hand over his groin.

********

"Thanks for helping with the dishes."

"No problem. *Mom*."

They smiled.

"I really wanted to thank you for letting me stay."

She looked at him more seriously.

"You're always welcome, Xander."

That looked at each other for a moment. Then Joyce added nervously.

"You're my son after all."

They both smiled awkwardly.

********

Giles collapsed on her.

"Wow, that was even better than the first two times."

She sighed in contentment when she felt him kiss her neck.

"Who would have thought, that your stay would turn out to be such a great idea."

"Guys? Why is the store closed at this time?"

They jumped up at Xander's voice. Buffy just managed to cover herself with Giles' shirt, while Giles only could cover himself with... well, Buffy.

"What are yo-"

"Please, Xander, tell me that you are alone."

"I'm dead and have gone to heaven."

"Xander?!?"

"I'm alone, yes. God, I hope I didn't interrupt you."

"No, we were just finished."

"Too bad."

"Xander!"

"I mean, good."

He kept grinning at them.

"Do you think, you could bring yourself to leave us, so that we can get dressed."

"Oh, yes, sure."

He closed the door behind him, only to open it again after a few seconds.

"Xander!!"

He closed the door again, grinning.

********

Three days later Buffy and Giles were in Buffy's room making love, while Xander was downstairs watching TV and Joyce and Mr. Peterson had left for an exhibition.

When Xander heard the door he rushed towards it.

"Oh, Joyce, what are you doing here?"

"I forgot something."

She walked towards the stairs, but he got in her way.

"You shouldn't go upstairs now."

"Why not?"

"You... I can get it for you, what is it?"

"Xander, you won't find it, but thanks."

She tried to get past him, but he didn't let her.

"Xander, could you please let me go upstairs. Mr. Peterson is waiting in the car."

"Joyce... I..."

He moved forward and kissed her.

After she got over the shock, Joyce started to kiss him back.

Xander had soon forgotten, why he had kissed her in the first place, but he was sure that he would be ever grateful for whatever it was. She tasted so sweet.

Their tongues brushed against each other and a shiver went through their bodies.

When they came up for air, they looked at each other, stunned.

"Wow, that was..."

They kissed again, moving towards the living room.

********

When Mr. Peterson entered the house to check in on Joyce, he was confronted with a picture of Joyce and her son kissing in the living room, while her husband and their daughter just came down the stairs kissing as well.

"Oh, my god."

"Mr. Peterson?! We can explain this."

Joyce and Xander looked at the stairs and saw Buffy and Giles arm in arm.

"Mom?"

"Buffy..."

"Uh..."

"Rupert?"

"We..."

"You were...?"

"What were *you* doing?"

"We... uh..."

"Mom?!"

"Buffy!"

"With Xander?"

"Why not with me, after all you and Giles..."

"Xander..."

"She'll find out anyway. And it's not really a big thing is it. After all your not her father."

He turned to Mr. Peterson.

"He's not her father. And I'm not her son."

"Then who are all of you?"

"Mr. Peterson I'm terribly sorry. This is Rupert Giles. He is Buffy's boss, a friend of her and apparently more than that, although I can assure you, I didn't know about it. Buffy really *is* my daughter and this young man...", she smiled affectionately at Xander, "... is Xander Harris, a friend of my daughter and..."

"Your lover?"

"Not yet."

Xander grinned at Joyce and she smiled back blushing a little.

"And why all this charade?"

"Well, we heard that you were, uh, conservative and felt that it would be better to not let you know that I'm divorced. I... I am truly sorry and can fully understand, if you choose to make business with another gallery, although I'd hate to lose you as a customer."

"Don't worry, Joyce."

"You'll still...?"

"Of course. I would have bought them anyway. And now I won't have to think of a good story to tell at parties anymore. This is hilarious."

Joyce smiled back a little uneasily.

"I think I'll go to that exhibition alone. Don't worry. I'll excuse you."

He turned around to leave. Then turned back again.

"And Joyce? I'm impressed."

THE END