A Few Too Many Revelations
Name: A Few Too Many Revelations
Spoilers: Season 4
Disclaimer: Not mine, Buffy and company belong to Joss, Mutant Enemy and the WB.
Rating: NC 17
Summary: Buffy discovers her true feelings for Giles, tells him then everything goes to hell.
When she awoke she realized that she was in her room, but it was different. It was not the room she remembered, but the furniture and stuffed animals were hers. Mr. Gordo was there, by her pillow so everything would be all right. She felt someone in the room and looked at the window. There was a man there, an older man with his head bent. She thought she heard him crying. Who was he and why was he so sad? The sound of him silently crying broke her heart.
"Wh..where am I?" She asked him.
"Buffy, you're home," he told her in an educated British accent as he quickly wiped the tears from his eyes before turning to her.
"Who are you?" She asked the man with the sexy British accent, "Where's my mom?"
"I'm Rupert Giles, a friend," he told her not able to keep the disappointment out of his voice. "I'll get your mother."
"Wait, do I know you?" she asked the man who seemed familar, his eyes were so sad.
"Yes, we've known each other quite a while. Buffy, what is the last thing you remember?"
"I was leaving school with my friends when some strange old man came up and started telling me some strange fantasy about vampires, I pushed him away and he landed fifteen feet from me. I didn't know what was happening. I've never been that strong." She told him with a very confused expression on her face. " My friends left, like real quick. Then I went to help him up and apologized. I had been having strange dreams and he knew about them. Do you know who he was? Where is he now? He told me I was the 'Chosen One', a Vampire Slayer? What was he talking about? Do you know? What's wrong with me?"
"Buffy, slow down, I'll answer all your questions. That was Merrick, your first Watcher. He was there to train you and to explain your destiny. You are the one girl born with the strength to kill the vampires and demons of the night. Merrick was there to help you understand your destiny and he died saving your life. I'm your Watcher now and have been for the past four years. As to what's wrong with you, well, yesterday was full of too many stresses and you pushed against them so hard that you passed out and went into a catatonic state. Dr. Steve Waterson is here and will be performing some tests later.
"Four years.....Where am I?
"You're home, in Sunnydale, you moved here with your mother when you were sixteen."
"Where is my dad? Isn't he here?"
"He lives in Los Angeles and has since he and your mother divorced shortly before you moved here."
"I don't believe you. Where is my mother?" She asked again.
Joyce stepped where her daughter could see her. She had heard the end of the conversation between Watcher and Slayer as she came up the stairs. She could sense the pain in Rupert.
"Buffy, I would never lie to you." he told her.
"Buffy, he is telling you the truth," Joyce told her daughter as she went to sit beside her on the bed. "Rupert has helped you through many tough times, more than I know about. He has always been there to help you."
"Help me. How?" she asked in a puzzled voice.
"Buffy, he has helped you in your destiny as the slayer."
"Mom, are you as crazy as he is?" There are no such things as vampires!" Buffy told her adamantly.
"Buffy there are more strange things than you remember. Rupert, would you go and get Angel? I think he may be able to convenience her."
"Joyce, do you think that's wise?"
"Yes, I want Buffy back like she was!"
"Wait, don't I get a say? Is everyone crazy? Who is this Angel character?" She demanded.
Giles left to get Angel.
"Honey, Angel is a friend who helped with your slaying....." Joyce told her as she went to the curtains in the room.
"What else?" Buffy demanded, as she watched her mother close all the curtains in her room. "Why are you closing the curtains?"
Joyce saw Angel at the top of the steps as she stepped out into the hall. She motioned him to come in. Buffy looked up and saw a very handsome man. Her stomach did a strange turning and she sensed something different about him. He seemed familiar but she could not remember where she had met him.
"Buffy, this is Angel."
"Who are you?" She asked him before turning to her mother, "Mom, something is strange about him."
"Buffy, that's your slayer instincts," the handsome man told her. "You may not remember being the slayer, but your body can't be fooled."
"What are you talking about? Is everyone crazy? There are no such things as vampires and slayers and any one who says differently......."her voice faded into silence as he morphed into his game face. "Get..get away from me." She told him as her mother hugged her.
"Buffy, I would never hurt you," he told her as he changed back to his human appearance. "I'm here to help you remember."
Steve, who had watched the scene with Giles, came in and asked Angel to leave.
"Buffy, my name is Steve Waterston, I'm a psychologist and I am here to help you. Everything that any of us tell you is the truth. If you feel that you can't handle anymore at any time just say so and we'll not tell you any more until you feel ready to hear it. Also, if we feel you are not ready to hear something you ask about we will tell you. At the moment, there are some tests that I would like to perform and the equipment will be here in a little while. I think that you should get dressed and come downstairs and eat with the rest of us and see if anything feels familiar. I understand that the last thing you remember was your first Watcher Merrick. I will talk to you about him later. I need to know everything that you remember and any thing that seems familiar."
The men left the room and Joyce helped Buffy change.
"Mom, where did I get this shirt? Why would I be sleeping in a man's shirt?"
"Honey, it's Rupert's. He brought you back to his house after he found you. I helped him to get your clothes off to make you more comfortable." "Oh. Are you and he dating?" she asked her mom.
"No. We're beginning to be friends."
"Why was he here in my bedroom and why am I wearing his shirt. If you're not dating him why was I at his house? Why is he so sad? I heard him crying."
"Buffy, he loves you very much. He has been very distraught since he found you."
"He loves me?" She asked feeling something strange that she didn't remember feeling before. "Mom, do I love him?"
"Yes, you do. You were going to move in with him before this happened," Joyce told her daughter.
"Mom, what did you think of me moving in with him?"
"Buffy, I have to admit I was not crazy about the idea and let both of you know in no uncertain terms. I'm sorry that I caused you so much pain."
"I don't remember him really, just feelings. I'm drawn to him. I know, I don't know how I know, I just know if we're together, everything will work out. Am I crazy, he is so much older than I am," she told her mother.
"Buffy, if two people were ever meant to be together, I know it's you and Rupert. When two people love each other, age doesn't matter. Let's get you dressed and downstairs for some lunch. Willow has ordered a smorgasbord for us all," Joyce told her daughter.
"Willow?" she asked, distracted from her thoughts about Rupert Giles.
"She and Xander are your best friends here in Sunnydale," she told Buffy as she helped her to put on a tank top and jeans. Buffy was very weak and needed help standing. "Buffy, are you able to make it downstairs or do you need some help?"
"Mom, I feel so weak, like I can hardly put one foot in front of the other," Buffy admitted to her mother. It felt strange to be so weak and helpless. She knew this was not right, but she could not remember why? " but, I think I can make it," she told her mom as she started for the door only to fall after three steps.
Hearing a fall from upstairs, Giles ran up the stairs as fast as he could. He was at Buffy's side before Joyce could even make it across the room to her daughter. He lifted her gently and set her back on the bed. "Buffy, are you alright?"
She looked into his sea green eyes and saw the love and concern in them. "I guess so. My legs gave out. It's like they had no strength to carry me," she told him.
"I'll carry you downstairs," Giles said, as he took her into his arms and carried her to the living room where everyone waited. "Don't worry, we'll find out what the problem is and take care of it, just like we always have."
As he carried her, she thought it should feel strange to be in his arms, but it didn't, she felt safe. What was she to him? She couldn't remember, but it felt right to have him holding her and for her arms to be around his neck. When she saw all the people in the living room she became shy.
Buffy felt a little overwhelmed by all the people in the living room she didn't remember. There were conflicting emotions and she was scared not knowing what was happening and not remembering these people who, she had been told, were her friends. She was confused about the feelings she was having for Rupert. She felt so safe with him, knowing on some basic level that everything would be alright. She knew she could count on him for any help she would need. She saw a red haired young girl and realized that this must be Willow, and the young man beside her must be Xander. She did not know the young woman seated by Angel or the man beside her. There was an older man beside the window who looked at her with a sad longing in his eyes. He looked to be in his sixties and she could not place him but felt he had played some part in her life. Giles sat her on the couch and sat beside her placing his arm protectively behind her.
Buffy looked at the red haired girl and tentatively asked "Willow?"
"Buffy, you remembered!" the joy in the young woman's voice plainly evident.
"Well, not really, I'm just guessing. It's a little bit strange you knowing me and I don't remember any of you except, for my mom and Rupert does seem very familiar"
"It's ok, Buff, we'll help you. You and Giles can over come anything?"
"Giles, you know, Rupert Giles...."
"Oh, I call you Giles?" Buffy asked turning to the man beside her.
"Buffy, you did until yesterday, you can call me whatever feels right. I've been called lots worse, believe me." he told her with a lightness that did not completely extend to his eyes. He loved her so much. She had to remember their love. Giles wondered if he would be able to again hide his feelings for her after yesterday, when his greatest dream had finally come true. He watched as she got reacquainted with her friends and felt her draw closer to him as he felt her fear. She started to get up off the couch to cross to the counter to get something to drink and her legs again gave way. He jumped up and caught her before she hit the floor and placed her back on the couch. Steve came to her and asked what had happened. "My legs don't want to work," she told him the fear in her voice clear to everyone in the room, As she held tightly to Giles as held her, comforting her. She could feel how much he loved her and was overwhelmed by the emotions she felt in response.
"Buffy," Steve started, "I will start the tests after lunch when the equipment arrives. Then I have arranged for a CAT scan at the local hospital at 4:00 p.m. Buffy, I will find the cause of the problem and together, all of us will find an answer."
After they ate, Steve spent the rest of the afternoon performing various tests and talking with Buffy to help him in his diagnosis of the situation. Giles and Joyce went with Steve and Buffy to the hospital for the CAT scan. Steve had Giles and Joyce in a separate room where they could watch as the CAT scan was being performed. Steve pointed out areas of trauma which had been caused by Buffy's mental state.
"The news is good and bad. There is no physical reason for her not being able to walk. She has pushed a part of her life away that has caused her too much pain for so long. In the past, she has had to handle very stressful situations, but only one or possibly two at a time. This time there were too many stresses at once and she couldn't 'deal' to borrow a phrase from Willow. I think she has regressed back to a point before she knew she was the Slayer to 'deal' with the stress. In doing so she has left the very people that have helped her since she came to Sunnydale. This can be a very tricky situation, especially if she does not want to remember.
"What can we do, I want my daughter back," Joyce pleaded with him.
"We have to be patient and find out what she will want to come back to. Rupert, I believe you will be the link that she will remember. I noticed how comfortable she seemed with you when she woke up. I have some questions, ah some very personal questions to ask."
"What is it? Steve I'll do anything and everything in my power to help her," Giles assured him.
"What is your relationship with Buffy?"
"Before yesterday, we were friends, very good friends. Night before last, when I went on patrol with her we were attacked by ten vampires and I got hit on the head and knocked out. I was not hurt any worse than I have been in the past, but it upset Buffy, more than I realized. Then yesterday she came to my home and told me that she had realized that she loved me," he told Steve.
"Have you made love?"
"Yes, yesterday afternoon." Giles told him, embarrassed by Joyce standing there hearing about their making love.
"Was that the first time?"
"Yes, Buffy had just realized how she felt. We talked and made love."
"Rupert, how long have you loved her?"
Giles looked at Joyce and truthfully answered, "Almost since the day I met her. At first as a father would love his daughter, but the feelings deepened and I realized after her 18th birthday that I loved her as a woman. I felt that she would never return my love and didn't want to hurt her or make her feel uncomfortable so I wasn't going to tell her how I felt."
"So before yesterday, she thought of you as....?
"Her friend and her watcher."
"Ok. How about Riley?"
"Buffy said she had broken it off with him. She later pummeled him at the cemetery, before she collapsed."
"I need to talk to him, do you know where I can find him?"
"Willow will have his number."
"Ok. The scan is finished and I want to get her home as soon as the films are printed."
He left Giles and Joyce standing in the waiting area while he finished the paperwork. Giles didn't know what to say and was still embarrassed about having to discuss his romance with Buffy in front of her mom.
"Rupert, I had no idea you cared so much," Joyce said, breaking the silence.
"Joyce, I don't want you to think I would do anything to ever hurt your daughter. She is everything to me. I have loved her so long, I feel that I'm in a dreamworld."
"I wish this were a dream and we all would wake up and Buffy would be herself again."
"So do I, Joyce, so do I," he told her as they were joined by Steve, who was pushing Buffy in a wheelchair. Giles hated to see Buffy in a wheelchair. He understood the need, but to see his love in a chair nearly broke his heart. When he looked at Joyce, he saw the same expression on her face.
"We can head back to your home, Joyce. The test results should be available in the morning and there are a few people I still want to talk to and I need to talk to everyone again."
"Rupert?" Buffy asked looking at the man she could not stop thinking about.
"Would you push me? Steve wants to stop too much."
"I'll be glad to, luv," he told her and took the chair from Steve pushing Buffy toward the exit and Joyce's car.
"Joyce, I think their relationship will be the key to getting her memory back. I'm sorry if I embarrassed you by the questions I had to ask Rupert, but I needed the information then to make some decisions on Buffy's treatment."
"I think you embarrassed Rupert more than me. He is a very private man and keeps too much to himself. More than I realized."
"So, you're ok with his relationship with Buffy?"
"Oh, I really blew my stack yesterday afternoon and all I did was add to the stress that my little girl was feeling. I was a fool."
"Joyce, don't blame yourself. You only acted as most mothers would act when they think that their child is in danger or being taken advantage of. How do you feel now?"
"Now? I don't understand how I could have missed it. He loves her so much. In these last twelve hours I have seen a side of Rupert Giles I never knew existed. He seems almost as helpless and lost as Buffy, as fragile as she is."
"In some ways he is. But he and Buffy are very strong people. They have to be to deal with what they do everyday. Buffy and Giles have a very strange calling and they are lucky that they have each other and they have people who love and care about them."
"Steve, do you think you will be able to help Buffy?"
"Joyce, it's a little too early to offer that sort of opinion, but from what I have learned about your daughter and her watcher, I believe that they can overcome anything, as long as they are together."
End Part Seven