Am I Dreaming?
By RenZach

TITLE- Am I Dreaming?
SPOILER WARNING- at least up to Amends
DISCLAIMER- Buffy and Giles are not mine though how I wish they were, there would be so much bg goodness then. :)
SUMMARY- Buffy is dreaming about Giles
FEEDBACK- oh please oh please oh please.

The dream began the same as every other one this week. She was lying on a monstrous four poster bed, red velvet hung from its sides. Her form was covered only by a white silk nightgown but she was warmed by a fireplace nearby. A noise from the doorway caused her to stir. It was him, the man she knew would come, had waited breathlessly for. He was dressed in a fine satin robe tied loosly at his waist and beneath it matching trousers. He breezed over to where she lay as though he were floating on a cloud. She sat up to be closer and ushered him to sit beside her. The bed moved as he gently lowered himself to be by her side. His arm stretched out to lightly caress her face stroking it with affection. Her mouth moved closer to his, she needed to feel his soft lips against her own. Closer and closer they drifted until finally she heard a high pitched buzzing sound.

She snapped awake, sweat pouring from her. "Why does it always end before it gets good?!" She groaned in frustration. Every night it was the same, mere moments before she could kiss Giles she would be wrenched from the dream. At first the thought of kissing Giles had bothered her, after all he was very very old and it was gross right? Her thoughts had started to change on that subject by the second night. He had looked so darn sexy in his robe and she had been so utterly dissapointed when the dream had ended before she got to feel what his lips would be like, how they would taste. That thought had suprised her most of all. Did she really wonder how his lips would taste? By the third night she knew that she had to find out the answer to her questions. On the fourth she had a revelation, she was falling in love with Giles, not just the dream Giles but the man who had always been by her side. When she reflected on who he really was, how he had stuck around even when she had given him so many reasons not to. Well now she knew that she needed to show Giles how much he meant to her, as a friend, a watcher and as the best man she had ever met.

Giles woke up in a sweat for the fifth morning in a row, goodness these dreams were vivid. The first night he had woken he'd been dissapointed that it hadn't gone further but as the nights wore on and the dreams continued he found solice in them. To be able to touch Buffy's face and see that look of passion in her eyes, well he knew that that vision would help him through the days. In one of the dreams he had confessed his love to her and she had reciprocated. He knew this would never happen in real life but to see those words come from her mouth, even in a dream, was bliss. He decided he'd best get up before the pull to go back to sleep and dream of his hearts desire became too great. He was just padding down the staircase when a soft knock sounded at the door. Who could it be this early, Buffy had a key and usually didn't have the manners to knock first.

She waited impatiently on the doorstep not sure what to say, you'd think after rehearsing all morning something would have come up but everything seemed so lame in comparison to what her heart felt. A plan was adopted right there and then, one that would prove her devotion once and for all. The door opened slightly and she saw Giles' eye peek through the crack. "Why Buffy, it's so wonderful to see you, I mean because that m..m...means patrol went well last night." Stuttering, she decided was entirely sexy when it was Giles doing it. "You'll have to excuse me I'm afraid I just woke up, but do come in, I'll put on some tea." "Before you do that Giles, I have a question." "Hmmm ...and what would that be?" "Do you know of any spells that would make it so I couldn't hide anything from you, no matter how hard I tried, therefore you would know my every thought and emotion?"

Well that had certainly thrown him for a loop, what could she possibly want with a spell like that? Unless somehow he had let his affection slip for her once too often and she wanted to know the truth? "Buffy I'm not sure that a spell is always the best idea, especially a spell like that I mean there are things all of us wish to hide." "Well I wouldn't expect anyone else to do it, I just thought that that way you would be able to fully trust me again and it would make things easier on patrol." "Buffy I do trust you, I know now that you hid Angel from me because you thought it would protect me, which assumption you're never going to make again right?" "Right." Her head lowered to the ground in shame. Giles' hand snaked out and reached under her chin tilting her head up until she was looking him in the eyes. "I'm sorry Buffy I didn't mean to make you feel guilty again, but I do trust you implicitly." "Thank you Giles, I'll make sure you never regret that, but I really want you to do the spell anyway, please pretty pretty please with sugar on top." Giles had to snap himself out of the vision of Buffy covered in sugar in order to respond. "If you're really sure you want to do this, I do know of a simple spell." She nodded eagerly and set to making the tea while he gathered the neccesary ingredients.

Fifteen minutes later they were seated on his living room floor inside a large red pentagram. "There is still time to back out of this if you so desire Buffy, the affects of the spell are only temporary but I'm sure they will last long enough to make you wish you had changed your mind." "I've never been more sure of anything in my life Giles, well maybe of one more thing but you're about to find that out." He sprinkled some herbs in her direction and chanted something in latin that she would have to get him to translate for her later. At first she felt nothing but after a short time she began to grow dizzy and weak. "Don't be alarmed Buffy what your feeling is perfectly normal, it will pass quickly and then the spell will take effect." She sat still with her head in her hands for a minute, it started to slowly clear until it was like there had never been anything wrong.

Giles could start to feel emotions wash over him, pain, guilt and shame were seemingly a large part of Buffy's psyche. Beyond all of that though there was something shining bright like the sun, he waded through all the negative feelings until he was bathed in warmth. There he saw a scene play out before him in Buffy's mind, he seemed to recognise it somehow. He gasped as he realised this was the scene from last nights dream, how could she possibly know what he had dreamt? Of course they had shared their dreams like Angel and she had last christmas. If she knew what he had dreamt then obviously this spell had all been in order for her to show him she didn't feel the same way. His heart clenched in pain at that but he felt no feelings of disgust or hate coming from her so that had to be good right? Paying closer attention to the warmth coming from her it became clearer to him. The warmth was love, deep all encompassing love, a love so passionate it almost blinded him.

Realisation dawned, this powerful love that Buffy felt was directed at him. He was the man she was picturing, dreaming about and sitting before. His heart soared with unspeakable joy as he let her love wash over him, to balm all his doubts and pain from years gone by. He saw her doubt flicker and knew that he had spent too long basking and that it was time to shower her in kisses. First he wanted to give her the gift that she had so touchingly given to him. He grabbed some more of the herbs and sprinkled them on himself, the chant was altered slightly but the purpose remained the same. The dizziness swept over him and he waited patiently until it passed, then he would be able to fill Buffy with the love they shared.

At first Buffy wasn't quite sure what was going on, she had expected a number of reactions but nothing quite like this. Rejection she was expecting, not quite prepared for but expecting none the less, happiness possibly, probably revulsion, definitely shock. Sprinkling himself with herbs and chanting was not where her mind had gone however. Suddenly she was overwhelmed with emotion and realised what he had done. He was filled with so much pain, almost more than she could bear, she cried out for him and the tears coursed down her face. Beyond the pain though was a bright light that soon covered and finally erased all his agony. She felt the power of Giles' love for her crash into her body, overwhelming her senses until there was nothing left but joy and passion.

When the sensation left she almost cried, it had felt so good to be covered in his love and for it to be gone was almost too painful to bear. In an instant his arms were around her soothing her with his hands and voice, drying her tears with his kisses. Her face turned until his next kiss landed on her lips and she sighed into his mouth. He pulled back and she whimpered not yet ready to relinquish the hold he had on her. He stared into her eyes and swore he could see her soul there. She gazed back into his green eyes and was transfixed by the love stored inside.

"I love you with all my heart, my dearest, I always have." Her heart melted at his term of endearment. "And I love you too Giles, I know it took me a little longer to get there than you but you've always known I'm somewhat challanged." He moved to assure her he never thought such a thing but was stopped by the sweet smile on her face. "It may have taken me a while but I know it now, I know that you're the bravest man I have ever met, the most patient which to be with me will be a neccesity'" He smiled at that but let her continue, he didn't think he'd ever get enough of her declaring her love to him. "You are the best man I have ever met. I know I'm not worthy of your love, but I will, if you'll let me, spend the rest of my life trying to deserve you. Let me love you Giles, let me show you how you look through my eyes. I'm yours now and forever if you'll have me." "Oh Buffy, my slayer, my love, my life, nothing would please me more than to spend eternity with you." He bundled her back up into his arms, thankful she had slayer strength for any normal woman would have been in pain from his embrace by now. Buffy wasn't sad that the dreams would stop for she had the real thing and was never letting go.

Ethan saw everything from his vantage point at Giles' window. "About bloody time, you two are thicker than fyarl demons neck, well don't say I never did anything for you Ripper." He stalked off silently in the night miffed that he would never be able to collect on this favour. He would be the only one that would know the true story of how Ripper and that daft slayer got together, well for now at least. He smiled at the thought of future hijinks with those two, things were never dull when it came to them. "Goodnight old boy" "Did you hear something Giles?" "Nothing exsists to me but you luv, now come back here and let me prove it" She smiled a saucy smile at him as she wrapped her arms around his neck and moved in for more smoochies.